13 Common Thought Distortions That Haunt Us and How to Challenge Them
Our minds can play tricks on us, distorting reality and fueling stress, self-doubt, and overwhelm. These cognitive distortions are automatic, but once you recognize them, you can challenge them and regain clarity.
1. All-or-Nothing Thinking
Seeing things in black and white—if it’s not perfect, it’s a total failure.
Example: “If I don’t handle this flawlessly, I’m a terrible leader.”
2. Overgeneralization
Taking one negative event and assuming it applies to everything.
Example: “I didn’t handle that meeting well—I’ll never be a good leader.”
3. Mental Filtering
Ignoring the positive and focusing only on the negative aspects of a situation.
Example: “I received 20 positive comments, but I can’t stop thinking about the one criticism.”
4. Disqualifying the Positive
Finding ways to dismiss compliments or successes as unimportant.
Example: “They said I did a great job, but they were just being nice.”
5. Mind Reading
Assuming you know what others are thinking (and that it’s negative).
Example: “She didn’t say anything about my idea—she must think it’s terrible.”
6. Catastrophizing
Expecting the worst-case scenario and believing you won’t be able to handle it.
Example: “If I make a mistake, my reputation will be ruined forever.”
7. Emotional Reasoning
Believing that because you feel something, it must be true. This is actually an issue with your interpretation, not your emotions.
Example: “I feel like I’m not good enough, so I must not be.”
8. Should Statements
Using rigid, unrealistic expectations for yourself or others.
Example: “I should always have the right answer. I should never struggle.”
9. Labeling
Turning a single mistake or flaw into a fixed identity.
Example: “I missed a deadline—I’m so lazy and incompetent.”
10. Personalization & Blame
Taking responsibility for things outside your control or blaming yourself for everything.
Example: “If my team is struggling, it must mean I’m a bad leader.”
11. Magnification & Minimization
Blowing up your mistakes while downplaying your strengths.
Example: “That small error I made is a huge deal, but my successes don’t really count.”
12. Fortune Telling
Predicting the future negatively without evidence.
Example: “There’s no point in applying—I know I won’t get the job.”
13. Believing Your Thoughts
Assuming that just because you think something, it must be true—even when there’s no real evidence.
Example: “I keep thinking I’m not cut out for this, so it must be true.”
How to Challenge Thought Distortions
–Notice the pattern: Which distortions show up for you most?
–Ask yourself for evidence: Is this thought 100% true? What else might be true?
–Revise the thought: What’s a more balanced way to see this?
Learning starts with awareness. The more you challenge these distortions, the more freedom and confidence you’ll build.
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- Learn how to express emotions in a way that gets your needs met
- Break the cycle of emotional reactions that lead to conflict
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